This One's for you Hakeem

Being one to often play down in the post, I would have to say that the best move in all of basketball when properly executed is Hakeem Olajuwon's famous "dream shake." This move has been replayed literally 1000s of times, showing Hakeem embarassing David Robinson in the Western Conference finals back in 1995. You may be wondering, what is the "dream shake?" Why am I writing about it? The answer is because this infamous move had an unusual impact on my life just last night.

To understand what I'm talking about, let me walk you through that famous edition of the shake. Now, let me begin by saying that some attribute the "dream shake" name to any number of moves Hakeem had perfected, as he was known to literally gyrate his hips and shake his arms to and fro in order to confuse his opponent on nearly all hooks, drop steps, and fade-away jumpers. The move I shall explain however, is perhaps the most beautiful. It begins with a dribble down the baseline toward the basket. If your opponent cuts off your path you come to a stop, pick up your dribble, and throw up one very lame unconvincing shot fake directly towards the hoop, hopefully lame enough to set up the series of moves that follow. Your opponent merely flinches, and thinks he is in control as your fake did not move him, and now you are stuck. Instead, you pivot away from the basket as if to perform a last ditch effort fade-away jumper. The opponent thinks he has you where he wants you, as he leaps to block the shot you have made obvious you are performing. Little does he know though, that this is yet another, more exaggerated fake. The result - your opponent flying past you - allows you to step under his shot blocking attempt, and casually lay the ball into the basket, the ultimate display of low post dominance. The move is especially great because it really gives you 3 choices of shots to take, depending on how the opponent reacts.

Well, to get to my personal experience, last night I decided to go play some late night basketball to release some unwanted energy. About half way through the game, I caught the ball on the wing and went in to perform the shake. I proceeded with lame fake one, turned to sell fade-away jumper, and then as I leaned in to lay the ball back in the basket I felt something hard come down on my head. It seems fake number 2 was so good the defending player jumped as high as he could for the fake, and accidentally came down elbow first on my head. The funny thing about the play was that I did not call a foul at this point, as my path to the basket was visible. As I went to the lay the ball in however another player reached out and slapped at my arm and I called the foul, upset that I couldn't get the ball up over the rim despite the contact. I grabbed the ball to throw it back to the top of the key to continue the game when about 3 players all at once said, "Oh shit!" That was when I felt something streaming down my face, redish brown hue. I was dripping blood from the newly formed cut in my head, courtesy of the accidental elbow.

To make a long story short, I had about an inch long gash right around the hairline in the middle of my head. I declined an ambulance (in case I had a concussion they didn't want me to drive) and drove myself from the CCRB to the hospital (as I was driving I was kinda thinking I might request a ride home, as I was a little out of it). I must say the ER was fast for once, and within an hour I was on my way home with 5 fresh staples in my head. I was feeling better and decided to drive, with no further problems. Now the funny part is that I'm supposed to avoid washing my hair till Thursday, so that's pretty nasty. But oh well, it could have been worse. At least Hakeem would have been proud.